Once I used to wonder why people who had fallen in love, gotten married because of the love could one day hate each other enough to divorce, fight over property and kids, and then turn to bitter enemies.
It just did not make sense to me.
Don't they remember what it was that led them to fall in love?
Surely people do not change so much that they become total strangers.
Now God is giving me a chance to find out first hand.

I am being given a front seat view watching my brother's marriage fall apart after 7 years.

Yes it is possible to change drastically into another character.
Yes it is possible for someone to play act a role of being someone else for years until one day u find that u cannot hide ur true self.
Yes people with bipolar personalities do exist.
Yes a person can keep lying for years before being discovered.

It is a good thing that we believe in God.
Whatever a person does, He is the final judge.
U dont have to wreck ur life to solve ur situation.
The indians call it Karma.
It will come back to u.
Maybe not right now but there will be the time.

Life goes on.
It may be painful now but there will be joy ahead.

Cyber connection

It is strange but people I met and maybe will only know on a cyber basis have become a real part of my life.
When I first started going on the internet (those days we had use dial up service with all the funny start-up noises), I met many people mostly from abroad because at that time not many people from where I am could understand or even afford the expensive service.
I was introduced to the existence of chat rooms by a cousin who is a top cardiologist of the country.
It seemed strange to me that the foreigners were made up of people from all walks of life as the internet service in their country had by then reached a reasonable rate. I met truck drivers, engineers, doctors, teachers, even one lady who was by then an illegal from Canada who entered the USA after leaving her husband and kids to follow her heart (in the form of some odd job guy from the latter country!)
At that point in time I was also watching my dad slowly releasing his hold on life. My dad was always my hero and deep inside I knew we were losing him to the Almighty. I was mostly in denial. He was in and out of the hospital.
I used my connection to the cyber world to express/ release / overcome my pain.
In my real world I am expected to keep my emotions in check and I did that.
Chat rooms are not entirely safe as even then u had predators.
I knew I was safe mainly because I was one of the few from this part of the world, half a world away from almost everyone at that time.
I made several friends and a few true and sincere ones whose friendship has lasted over a decade now.

For many years now we all have stopped going to the chatrooms now (do they still exist?)
I mainly facebook and blog. Of course I surf the net for work and pleasure but that is not interactive.

The internet is now cheap in my country. Everyone uses it. Not exclusive anymore.
I read in the newspapers that it has become a dangerous place.
I am still lucky that even the friends I made recently turn out to be good people.
But then maybe it is because I am normally a careful person.
The values that my parents instilled in me even prior to the existence of the internet remain useful and applicable even in a world they do not understand.
Values preceed technology.

another weekend

I had to attend a three day conference at work last week.
It even cut thru my weekend so by the end of it I was really tired.
Went to mom's late Saturday and found that my nephew who had returned from Egypt was spending the night there.
That helped to lift up my weekend as we had lots to chat about.
Sunday morning mom and I went t5o the hypermarket and did MAJOR shopping!
Nephew and brother went for a game of badminton at the club.
Nieces had their religious classes.

At the hypermarket I got several texts.
My sister,thinking I was at my place, invited me to join her to visit one of her sons at boarding school.
Too bad I had to turn down that offer cos that would also have been a lot of fun.
Then i got a text from a friend.
Our mutual friend who had adopted a down syndrome baby twenty one years ago had lost her special child due to hole-in-the-heart.
The mother is a lovely lady, and I know it must be very hard for her.

This weekend another friend also was in touch with me via the phone.
We were in constant communications in 2010 but had sort of drifted apart since the begining of this year. It was nice to find that we still 'clicked' even though the dynamics of our friendship had shifted.

As is my habit, I plan my vacation way ahead of time.
So as busy as I have been, I am starting to mentally work out my vacation plans for middle of this year. Plane tickets fluctuate so I have begun to keep an eye on them....and will book when it reaches a low.

After that I have a whole lot of paper work to get done as part of the procedure.
Last year was Alaska and it was an exceptional holiday.
We have not really decided what to do this year.
One suggestion was to just not worry abou it, get in the car and travel.
Sounds good to me.
Even if it is still almost half a year away.

Low day

Its disturbing to feel 'low' after so many days of feeling on top of the world.
It came rather suddenly.
I was talking with a friend who was relating what he and his GF did over the long weekend.
After that chat, I felt rather alone (weird cos I did not spend the long weekend alone; it was full of fun and family!)

I have been very busy at work with hardly a moment to spare.
Time chasing, so much to be done.
A lot of reading and understanding before delivery.

As usual, when I am feeling this way, I tend to hit out to the one closest to me.
I do not physically hit anyone...hehe.....I have never raised a finger to anybody in my life.
I just let out my feelings via emaiIs......not nice either, huh?
I have been lucky so far, cos I am loved enuff by the email receivers for them to understand that it is just a temporary silly lapse I get into sometimes.

Back to everyday life.
I also just discovered that I do my not like it much when my foreigner friends take it upon themselves to write and remark on my country's economy, politics, religion, etc.
Of course it is their right to do so but I do not have to like it especially when the basis of their opinion is not strong enough in my eyes.

It is getting late and I should be in bed.
Tommorrow is another long day at work.

Back at work

I am at work after 4 days off for the chinese new year celebrations.
It is good to be back even though initially we are on a slower rhythm.
I do enjoy my work (most of the time!)

My cough was almost over by the end of the weekend but last night it returned almost full force.
I now think that it is the juice that I extract using the juice extractor.
I had green apples, celery and ginger (omitting the cucumber and carrots) last pm.
I had stopped since middle of last week but decided to resume the 'health drinks' cos I thought it was an added benefit.
I'll stop once again and see if there is any effect.

This week looks like I might need to work through the weekend.
Ah well..... take it as it comes.
And enjoy it as it comes too.
:-)

Safely home.

My nephew arrived home safely this morning.
All my siblings and all their families were at the airport to greet him.
He looks great and is in hign spirits.
But even with the few minutes that we had at the airport there were many scary storiesto share.

There are stories of death of civilans in the hands of the escaped prisoners.
There are also stories of how the students banded together for safety.

When my nephew left three months ago I told him that he will face some challenges cos when he comes back, he would no longer be a boy but prolly be a man.
I didn't know it was only about 4 months later that he would return.
And yes, he has grown up too.
He has faced challenges he never dreamed he would in that short span of time.

At least he is safe.
My mom is happy her grandchild is home.
His mom and dad are happy their child is home.
And I, his aunt am estatic that my nephew is safely home.

Chinese New Year 2011

The second day of Chinese New Year 2011 is almost over.
The Chinese celebrate 15 days of the new year, finalising it with the Chap Goh Mei where the singles will look out for a potential partner on that last day.
I have had a wonderful two days.
I went to my mom's on the eve of CNY.
Spent a night there, playing with my litle nieces.
I don't know who enjoys that more - nieces or me?
We have silly games that no one else understand such as hiding under the comforter which we pretend to be a magic tent, hiding from 'giants' who would turn out to be my mom or the maid!

Then on CNY I took mom out shopping prectically the whole day.
We then went to my condo to spend the night there.
We had dinner with my sister and her boys.
That was really fun.
During dinner mom surprised the boys with gifts cos they will bve leaving for boarding school soon.
Then she surprised both my sis and me with a cheque each.
It was a sizable sum.
My mom does things like that.
She said that when she fell ill last year she had decided to give away some of her assets to her children.
I always tell her she should NEVER give away all that she owns.
One, because everyone needs to earn their own living.
Two, u never really know who u can trust forever.
Three, u never know who will actually outlive u.

It made my mom happy to do what she did.
Previously she gave us cheques when we had family get togethers so everyone of her five children received their share at the same time.
This time she gave us on an individual basis.

God bless my mom.
When I was younger, an close Indian friend once had her astrologer (?) do a life fortune telling on me!
I took that in fun cos I do not believe in foretelling.
Anyways the guys apparently said that I was supposed to really love my dad and respect my mom.
I did think that he got that part rather right.
But that was then.
Now at my age and stage in life and looking back at my life,
I know that I love and respect BOTH my parents for always being there for me.

p.s. My nephew might be home as early as tomorrow if his flight goes thru!

Egypt unrest

There is unrest in Egypt.
The people are unhappy with their president.
Maybe he has been there for too long.
I dont know.

I have lived in country where we have had a prime minister who was in power for many years too.
He helped us change our paradigm of thinking..
However, after he had been in power for a while, there were people who thought he was there for too long.
Like the first prime minister, this man also gracefully left his seat.
It was after he left and we had a weaker replacement did people really appreciate the good that he did.

How does the situation in Egypt affect me?
It does on a personal level.
My brother's son is there.
He went just last year to do medicine.

I called my mom, then my sis-in-law to know whether he is ok.
SIL said she was unable to contact him.
Then I tried on my phone and was able to speak to him.
He sounded a little disoriented (it was way past midnight where he was)
Time difference.
It was good to know he is ok but we need to get him out of there before the situation worsens.

That is what we are working on now.
He needs to be safe first.
We will worry about the rest later.

It was possible (yesterday) to get fight tickets.
They say that the airports are also chaotic.
I pray that things will be stable enough for planes to land and take off.
A few more days before his flight.
Prayers.